I have been so overcome by grief regarding typo's death that I have not
been able to
respond here.
I have been going through the incredible amount of
Emails I have saved
from him, and can't stop crying. I still am at a loss in how to
manage it, I wish I knew
the circumstances of his death.
I still wish I knew
more about his family though
and could connect with them. Maybe it would help me to have some
closure on it.
Typo & I met in another chatroom, when he used the name Deimos in
1993 or 1994. In fact, he talked me into checking out tbichat, Without
him I would've never connected to this place. We became close
cyberfriends, and I was honored that he allowed me into
part of his life, and allowed me to know personal things that he
normally did not share
with people on the net. We exchanged Email regularly, (I wondered
why I hadn't
gotten anything from him in the last month or so). We even
exchanged some snail mail
even though we both destest it. I cannot find them in the mess of
papers I have in
boxes, I wish I could remember his full name so I could find out
more about his death.
Typo was the one who helped me make changes in my life, to try to
create a life I
wanted. Typo is a lot of the reason I finally resigned my
professional position & dared
to move to the mountains, which I pined to return to when on the
plains. He helped me
to believe in myself again. He was the first person who ever
communicated to me that
he thought I was intelligent or that he admired anything about me.
Wow, I always
thought, for someone who was a walking encyclopedia with humor and
compasion,
that was pretty incredible!
When I faced homelessness after my episode of cellulitis in the
hospital and was
kicked out of my cabin & lost my job, it was typo who helped me pay
for a new place
to rent. Whenever I was going though a crisis, it was typo I first
wrote to. He could
help me to remember the tools I have, the skills I have learned in
something we both
have an interest in, NeuroLinguistic Programming. Typo was also the
first person I
wrote to when I wanted to share something I had joy in, or was
proud of.
I originally was going to write another post about grief, about
what I have done in the
past to help me through it, and an incredible organization I once
belonged to that
facilitates healing and growth after grief, but became so wrapped
up in my grief about
typo that I would rather make another post. about it.
In my own way, typo, I loved you very much and miss you terribly. I
will never be
able to visit now, a fanstasy I always had. I wish I could write
you now while I am
trying to get through this.